Preparing to Potty Train

I do not have the perfect method for potty training. I am not an expert. I found potty training my daughter to be really, really hard work. This blog aims to share my experiences about how we prepared for potty training.

I have found a great deal of support and encouragement from other parents, people who have been through similar experiences. Sometimes conversations make me think- ‘I’d never do that!’ or ‘Great idea’ or just reminded me that I needed to get on and do something. I hope that reading this is like having an encouraging friend.

We started quite early for most children in the UK at 20 months. Back in the 70s and 80s this was pretty common from what I can gather so I decided to just get on with it. There were some reasons which influenced my decision- Little Lady wore cloth nappies some of the time and truthfully, I was fed up of the dreaded soaking bucket in the garage. She also hated having her nappy changed by this age and would cry and scream- I’d had enough of that too. On the plus side, my daughter had lots of language and understanding and my own mother had managed it with me so it must be possible. Ha!

We did lots of getting ready to potty train before we actually started. I tend to over think and over plan so purchased a potty for Little Lady about a month before her first birthday. For a quite while the potty jut sat in the corner of the nursery.  We occasionally referred to it- that’s your potty. The first time that I sat Little Lady on the potty, I picked a time when she was in a really, really good mood. Well rested, well fed and generally happy. She was about 18 months old. I sat her on it without a nappy and really ladled on the praise. She was unsure at first but luckily my daughter loves books so I read a favourite story while she sat on the potty. Nothing was produced but that was fine- it was all about her being happy on the potty.

We repeated sitting on the potty having stories from time to time. Little Lady was pretty compliant and liked the praise. “Big girl sitting on the potty.’ ‘Clever girl.’ At times she really, really didn’t want to sit on it. Giving a clear ‘NO!’ I never pushed it. I made a real effort for the potty to be a place that she enjoyed. We didn’t do it every day and mostly it was just myself and my mum involved. 

Low stress and high praise. (For everyone!)

The first time that Little Lady produced a poo on the potty was cause for celebration and surprise. The first poo came before the first wee. She was pretty amazed but again I over did the praise and she was rewarded with a very small white chocolate drop. She was happy with the praise (and bribery) but bemused.

I work part time so when I was around or sometimes my husband or sometimes mum we would occasionally sit Little Lady on the potty for stories. This was usually after lunch or dinner when she was more likely to produce a poo. She got lots of praise for sitting on the potty and lots more plus a small chocolate if anything was produced. She also got to watch us empty out the contents of the potty into the toilet and flush it away.

This time on the potty was by no means happening every day- sometimes we were just busy or out and about. Sometimes Little Lady wasn’t in a compliant mood or just didn’t want to stop what she was doing and sit down.

There was a time when little Lady really disliked the potty and would cry if I tried to put her on it. I have no idea what started it or why it was happening but for a while, probably around a month, the potty just went back in the corner of the nursery. It was no big deal and the break from it was enough.

I also stumbled upon a story book about potties- ‘I want my potty’ which is a Little Princess story by Tony Ross. As Little Lady loves books this was a brilliant way to help her to understand what the potty was for.  She was also pretty used to seeing me go the toilet. Again this wasn’t sometimes that I intentionally planned but when you are looking after a toddler they want to know where you are and be with you! We'd done lots and we hadn't even started potty training yet- that excitement was still to come!